No Pain, No Gain

There is a man I see everyday in my way to work who just stands and begs for the cars passing by, I see him everyday; I mean everyday! Well except on Fridays and some Thursdays that I am off.

He is not that old not having strength to work, and he is so eager to earn money that he wakes up THAT early EVERY morning just for begging! And as I've noticed lots of cars pay him! and the amount they give him is out of my imagination! Some even give him one green paper! -we call it green paper in persian, it's 1000 Tomans which is a bit more than 1$, but since dollar is much more expensive than Tomans, 1$ would be much more to us than what it is to non Iranians.-

And today, I saw another man his age standing right beside him sweeping the street, I was wondering what differences people have that one begs for money and the other one sweats for it!

I don't like giving money to these kind of people, specially to this man, just because I think and know he can do something better than just standing and being no use for the society. Money doesn't come easily, it needs hard working, either by brain and knowledge or by strength and action.

Today I adored the old man sweeping the street. I wish people would notice and help the people who deserve helping, who at least try for it.

Asia Quake

It was just the day before the earth quake that I was writing about religion! Religon says if we do something wrong we will be punished, in both our lives. There you go! What did all those poor people do wrong to have such a disaster fortune? Did they deserve all this? Poor people, poor poor people :(

I feel so sorry for them...I really wanna know WHAT IS GOING ON IN THIS WORLD? Is God kind as it's been said in all holy books??!! Is he??!!! What is this? end of the world?!

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to all the christians who read this weblog :)

I am not christian. It's been written in my ID that I am a muslim, but I am not that either! Because I don't act as one. I don't pray, don't fast, don't read Quran, don't believe in the prophets, don't cover my hair, don't cover my hands or legs, I do drink, I do sing, I do dance, I do eat pork... I "do" and "do not" do lots of other things which muslims "should not" or "should" do! And it's all because of my own beliefs. I don't believe in any religion at all.

I believe I should be a nice human, that's all. A nice person for myself and for the others. No harm I should do to anyone, no bad feeling I should give to anyone, I should love people, and treat the others the way I want them to treat me. Isn't it the only reason why religion has been made for? So that people can get along and behave themselves? So that they can have the best life they could ever have? I think that religion is just an old version of law! And hell is the old version of jail!

I believe in the great power in life, but I don't need to pray for that. The power I believe in, donesn't need my worshiping! The power I beleive in, is much greater and much more generous than this!

But still I respect all other people's thoughts and beliefs. Everybody KNOWS the way they think is right, and that's why everybody's thought is precious.

Yalda Night

I donno if there is any word for this night in english, but we call it Yalda Night , it's the longest night of the year, which is the last day of autumn. We Iranian usually party this night and gather all the family members, some people stay awake till the morning. I'm not sure if I'll do that since I gotta wake up early tomorrow and go to work!

Well my birthday was cool, some of my close friends invited themselves!! I guess they wanted to surprise me but since my dad wanted to have a little party at the previous night of my birthday, they had to announce the surprise party. So it was not surprising at all!! And the funniest thing was that me and most of the guests arrived home at the same time! I was at work till then! What a hostess!

Sometimes I like to smoke after drink, and it was the first time my parents saw me smoking, and it was funny because all the girls smoked ,and except one guy, the other guys didn't even drink! We should say BAD GIRLS BAD GIRLS...instead of BAD BOYS BAD BOYS! :D

One of the guys was saying a joke about Rashti's - it's a city in Iran which lots of jokes are being made for the people of this city and my dad is from there - and suddenly he noticed my dad is from that city and he was going red, but my dad started saying jokes about his own city...cool dad!!! I like prtying with my parents around since my friends find them so cool.

And the best presnet I got exatly in my birthday by accident, was my first income I received from the company I work with at Network Marketing, it really made me happy, so this means I am going to reach my goals ;)

Happy Birthday to Me!

I was born exactly this day 29 years ago, I don't remember how I felt when I breathed for the first time, but I guess it was hard since I've been told that I started crying right away! And later I figured out that everybody else felt the same and did the same! There must be a reason entering this world hurts this much!

Now I am 29 years old. I have lived twenty-niiiiiiiine years which is 10585 days! That's a loooot! I am thinking...what I have gained through all these years...and what I have lost...

I've grown up in a very small family: dad, mom, my big brother and little me! I have become the only child since my brother got married and moved out to another city. Thanks to God I have understanding parents, specially my dad. I know it's hard handling youth these days, I am sure nowdays youth have become worst than us! But still I appriciate the way my parents handled me.

I have my own freedom, the one thing most Iranian singles -specially girls- look for, maybe that's the main reason I didn't get married soon. And of course the other main reason is that I haven't yet found THE ONE! But I think some people get married not because they've found THE ONE, but for reaching the freedom they did not have at their parent's. Yes I have heard it from some of my friends...whom are sorry for what they've done. Thanks momy and dady!

I like my life, I like living fancy, I'm happy I gain enough money to live the way I like. I am not rich, but I have enough, that's what's important.

Being at my 29th, I think I have all I've ever wished for, a wonderful family, a stable personality, some very good friends, good background, a good major -though my dad always wanted me to continue at least to M.S!- , a good job, a nice car, a house...but still there is one piece missing, the very important piece that I always dream for...I still don't have my man! The man of my dreams...

God, can you please give me my present for my 29th birthday?! Is it much to ask?! I promise to keep it forever!

10 Commandments

Check 10 Commandments link!

My Life

What I choose to do
is of no concern to you
and your friends
Where I lay my hat
may not be my home
but I will last
on my own

Cause it's me
and my life
it's my life

Oh the world has sat
in the palm of your hand
not that you'd see
and I'm tired and bored
of waiting for you
and all those things
you never do

Cause it's me, and my life
it's my life

Dido

Back from My Short Trip

Fortunately the weather was great, just a bit cold but no sign of snow even rain. Except the day we went to Shabnam's, the other two days wasn't that bad, everybody is back to their normal life, even me. Though we miss her, we keep doing our everyday habits; talking, laughing, eating, listening to music, even dancying...time really heals. I guess we are just getting used to not having her beside us. It's hard, but we are accepting it little by little.

The next time we are all going to gather in Astara will be in summer, for my another cousin's wedding. Instead of sad people in black, there would be happy people in beautiful fancy clothes, loud music and dance... even for Shabnam's parents...we'll miss her in the wedding.

The Last Member of the Big Family

All my family are now gathered at Shabnam's, in a very beautiful town in north of Iran named Astara. It's her first ceremony after she has left us. I am the last member who is still far away, and hope the weather stays clean so that I can catch my flight tomorrow. And still will have one hour ride to the town from the airport, which again I hope the road stays not frozen.

The last time I wanted to go there the flight was canceled because of the heavy snow and I had to cancel my trip since I couldn't find any place in the next flight! It's been exactly one year since my last visit from Astara and I miss all my family, though I know I will not see the most important one among them; Shabnam.

There's gonna be lots of lots of people wearing black, with sad faces, some with tears...
There's gonna be her beautiful picture surrounded with candles...
There's gonna be red roses rounded with black ribban; she loved red roses.
There's gonna be her mom and her dad, it's hard for me seeing them like this, we used to be like twins and I'm gonna always remind them of their daughter.
There's gonna be her brother, how can I tell him how sorroy I am that he doesn't have a sister anymore?
There's gonna be her little nephew who doesn't like God, blaming him for taking his aunt away!

And after a few days, everybody will go back to their own lives...that's how it has always been.
Only the memories will stay.

Quite a Day!

Yesterday was a day full of different events which I still don't know how I felt at last!
It was Saly's birthday, Mersedeh's wedding day, Shabnam's first ceremony, and figuring out the death of my old friend's mom, also figuring out cancer for my ex-fiance's dad.

A simple day can be the best day of some people's life and at the same time the worst for some others! I was happy; and at the same time sad.

The ceremony has been postponed to the weekend, which I'm gonna have a short trip to my cousin's hometown on the day after tomorrow. God bless her.

The wedding was fun, actually one of our friends couldn't come, since it was her husband's grandpa's ceremony as well!! Another complicated story for her!

How would you feel if you were in my place?!!

When you have to be Serious!

Why is it always like this ;when you have to be serious something funny comes up?

Just like at school, when the teacher is trying to get student's attention on a non important subject, and your classmate is showing funny faces and saying funny words on back of the teacher, and you can't cotrol not to laugh...oh I miss those days!

Yesterday I was in the exact situation, when this friend of mine - from high school - was sitting exactly infront of me in a very serious meeting and I was trying to concentrate on the speach; but something strange is between old friends, you can easily laugh and loose concerntration by even seeing each other's face! and it happened! I was just trying not to look at her so that I can control my laugh, but just couldn't! I was lucky it happened at the end of the meeting so it didn't look that bad and looked like at the end it was pleasant!